Friday, 10:30PM @ The Fountains; Be there and bring your dicks!

(via text)

Me (3:35 PM):
Scotland is really cool, wish a bro was here
Tom J (3:37 PM):
You me n beel should go camping up there. Wait wait. We should go camping on the monarch isles, take some banging speakers and the Dear Esther soundtrack.
Me (3:47 PM):
…we really should. Maybe youth hostelling rather than camping though.
Tom J (5:04 PM):
Probably a good idea. Might need a few more survival skill points before we camp on uninhabited scotish islands.
Me (5:11 PM):
I’ll start grinding by lighting campfires and pitching tents. IN MY PANTS.
Tom J (5:13 PM):
I’d better warn you that burning hair smells gross. Probably lower your encounter rate though, so that’s a plus.
Me (5:16 PM):
Encounters with what exactly?
Tom J (5:22 PM):
Kelpie, Cailleach Bheur, Caoineag, Cu Sith, Roane, Unseelie Court, the Slaugh…
Me (5:23 PM):
wtf
Tom J (5:25 PM):
shit dude be careful

I’m a magician, Spencer, a furious magician

MEANWHILE IN THE L4D EXPERT LOBBY

(0v0) Brosencrantz: I NEED YOUR TEETH FOR THE FEDERAL RESERVE
(0v0) Brosencrantz: YOU’VE ALREADY GOT ENOUGH APPLESAUCE
(0v0) Brosencrantz: THERE’S PLENTY OF APPLESAUCE ON YOUR PLATE
(0v0) Havokroft: I NEED YOUR TEETH FOR MY LONELY HEARTS CLUB BAND
(0v0) Havokroft: I LOVE YOU, SPENCER
(0v0) Default joined.
(0v0) Havokroft: I’M GOING TO SPANK YOU SILLY
(0v0) Havokroft: oh hi
(0v0) Havokroft: we were just…ah
(0v0) Havokroft: >_>
(0v0) Default: you don’t need to explain
(0v0) Brosencrantz: I’M GOING TO CUT INTEREST RATES IN HALF
(0v0) Brosencrantz: BUT I NEED YOUR TEETH

TUNA TWO-ONE ACTUAL WE ARE OSCAR MAYO, STAY SALTY

underneath the open sky says:
on a scale from 1 to 10 how much do you like black pepper?
Wild Bill Hovercraft says:
9
underneath the open sky says:
excellent
mmm it’s good to be home
we have hi-cap pepper pots here
back in bromingham it was RELOADING all the time
but at least they had clear perspex magazines
whereas this one is solid wooden furniture and you can’t tell when you’re about to run out
Wild Bill Hovercraft says:
*shunk* *CHH-CHK* WHO WANTS PEPPER
underneath the open sky says:
CLEARED HOT

madder than a mile-high statue of himself

for fear of living in regret says:
have you read Fever Crumb?
or something says:
I have, but I forgot most of it
for fear of living in regret says:
ah
so it’d be hard to coerce you into helping me with a Fever-based song and dance number
or something says:
more or less impossible
for fear of living in regret says:
Down south of the Barbican, raised and bred
In crazy old Godshawk’s giant metal head
chillin’, Scriven fearin’, engineerin’ all cool
and all makin’ some paper boys for the council’s rule
when an army of nomads, they were up to no good
started try’na mobilise my neighbourhood
Dr Crumb saw the cockney mobs and he got scared

or something says:
…wow
for fear of living in regret says:
he said “you’re ridin’ in this heat-balloon, up in the air”
yes, I did actually make that up on the spot
or something says:
holy shit
you should become a rapper
you could be bigger than flight of the conchords
for fear of living in regret says:
they’re not very big
or something says:
ssh
they’re big in my heart
for fear of living in regret says:
mine too
perhaps I should try a different angle
or something says:
like what?
for fear of living in regret says:
fever, fever when you’re weird-eyed, fever when you’re always right
or something says:
no
for fear of living in regret says:
fever, fever in the morning
fever all through the night

sabre rattlin’

Wild Bill Hovercraft says:
it’s not like it’s gonna affect argentina beyond “bawww no oil for them”
falklands are 300 miles away from their coast
empty space and you says:
but still closer to them than anywhere else, so they think they have a right
Wild Bill Hovercraft says:
it doesn’t work like that
or else we could claim iceland 
could build a pipeline funneling their lava across the sea to britain
have the whole country running on geothermal \o/
empty space and you says:
why am I always drinking tea when you say things like that

“what kind of car do you drive, nick?” “your mom’s car.” “that ain’t cool. serious.”

empty space and you says:
“We are not little men, and there is nothing that we are afraid of except Drink, and we have signed a Contrack on that. Therefore, we are going away to be Kings.”
Informal, often used to show contempt says:
cool holiday plans bro
empty space and you says:
so hey, want to drive to turkmenistan and set ourselves up as tinpot emperors?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mongol_Rally
Informal, often used to show contempt says:
you passed your theory, right?
empty space and you says:
yeah
Informal, often used to show contempt says:
should be enough

he passed away a true old west original/and near the end he liked it sprinkled on his food

baccarat detector says:
man I really ought to get my hearing looked at
just took drugs without meaning to
Hovercraft says:
*mumblemumblemumble*
…what
baccarat detector says:
me: OO CAKE
[redacted male]: mumble mumble it’s her cake
me: hey [redacted female] can I have some cake?
[redacted female]: mumble mumble
me: NOM
[redacted female]: YOU ARE AWARE THAT WAS HASH CAKE RIGHT
me: …oh. Am I cool now?
Hovercraft says:
…so you’re cooler than me without even trying?
baccarat detector says:
obviously
and now I have a funny anecdote for when anyone asks me if I’ve ever had weed
Hovercraft says:
[redacted the third] mentioned her friend was gonna hold a hash cake party ages ago and I’d be invited if I wanted, I said yes because I’m a “try anything as long as it’s not heroin or similar fucked up shit” mentality
but said party never materialised
baccarat detector says:
shouldn’t have any particularly ill effects
[redacted male] said that it wasn’t strong at all
and that dude… knows his weed >_>
Hovercraft says:
see, somehow I’ve never hung around with the necessary people to enable me to try it
also you should totally spike your next batch of flapjacks with LSD or something
baccarat detector says:
actually I did make… that exact joke *awesomeface*